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[04 Jul 2005|12:03pm] |
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Homesick - Mercy Me |
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God, I haven't updated in forever. But to be honest, I just haven't felt like it. Plus everytime I come to my users page I see Mandie's picture which just sucks even more. But todaqy I feel like I need to update.
Today's the 4th of July which reminds me so much of her. She always went bonkers over the 4th. She loved all the fire works and the red, white, and blue that was always all over the place. Today reminds me so much of her and I hate it. It's driving me crazy cause I miss her so much, and there is NOTHING I can do about it. I know today is killing her mom, she's been doing so awful since she saw everything that was written on her death certificate. Now she just wants everyone to leave her alone so that she can deal with this stuff on her own and cope with it on her own without people being all over her. So I'm respecting that and staying away from her. Which really sucks cause right now I want nothing more then to go over there and start crying on her shoulder. I haven't been over there since the day of the funeral. Part of me thinks that I can't go over there at all anymore cause I can't stand to walk in that house. Everywhere you look there is something that will remind me of her. And I don't want that, I don't need that. I always see something every single day as it is that reminds me of her. I can't even listen to the radio without thinking of her. Like the other day I heard "Daddy's Hands" and ran in the house crying cause that was Mandie's song for her dad and I just started thinking about how awful he's doing right now and that hurt so much, I couldn't take it. And yesterday I heard "Cowboy take me away", oh that was terrible, I CAN NOT listen to that song. It's torture to hear it. But I couldn't get up and leave, and I couldn't cry, so I was stuck there listening to that song holding in all of my tears that wanted so badly to escape.
Well, I'm done for now...I'm going to go and try and find something to do to occupy my time in hopes that the day is over quickly, with only minimum pain attached.
-Dani
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| "Our Little Redneck" |
[13 Apr 2005|08:52pm] |
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Incredibly saddened |
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Amazed - Lonestar |
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"Our Little Redneck"
Hard hitting reality,
That's nothing like a dream.
But more like a slap in the face,
Is how it seems.
With the bitter cold news,
About someone you loved.
Makes you stop and wonder,
"Are they watching from up above?"
Finding out they've left,
Before their time.
Makes you start to believe,
Life can stop on a dime.
Not being able,
To say your goodbyes.
Is the easiest thing,
To make you cry.
So take this time,
And give your last respects.
To the one you loved,
Our Little Redneck.
By: Cameron "Yammie" Henderson
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| Damageplan/Pantera |
[09 Dec 2004|02:19pm] |
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Cowboys from Hell - Pantera |
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Dimebag Darrell
1966-2004
Dimebag Darrell, guitarist for Damageplan and Pantera, was killed during a shooting spree at a Columbus, Ohio, nightclub Wednesday night. He was 38.
Darrell, real name Darrell Abbott, was among the five people killed during the incident. Also dead are the gunman, 25-year-old Nathan Gale of nearby Marysville, Ohio, and two fans, Nathan Bray, 23, and Erin Halk, 29, according to Columbus Police public information officer Sherry Mercurio. Gale also wounded two people.
Damageplan had just begun their first song in front of approximately 250 people at Alrosa Villa when the gunman jumped onstage, made a comment about Pantera, and began firing at close range into Darrell's body, shooting him several times before opening fire on the crowd.
Mercurio said an officer in the vicinity heard the call of shots fired shortly after 10 p.m., snuck in the back door of the venue and confronted Gale onstage. When the officer took the stage, he observed one victim and the gunman holding a hostage by the neck. The officer opened fire on Gale and killed him with a single shotgun blast, according to eyewitness accounts on CNN. One witness also told CNN that Gale reloaded his gun during the shooting spree.
Mercurio said the fifth victim's name and those of the two wounded have not yet been released.
"If the officer hadn't acted when he did and how he did, we'd probably be looking at more dead, because this guy was actively shooting," said public information officer Sergeant Brent Mull. Following the incident, police took housed more than 200 patrons onto three city-donated buses as they waited to interview them about the shooting.
Mull said he had been told there was no metal detector at the club, though could not confirm that at press time and a club spokesperson could not be reached. "The ones that were inside and witnessed this ran for their lives and were in fear for their lives," Mull said. "They are victims too, and we want to take care of them."
At a press conference late Thursday morning (December 9), Mull said there was no known motive for the shooting.
One of the witnesses, his jeans torn and soaked with blood, told CNN that he jumped on stage and attempted to give Darrell CPR before paramedics arrived.
As news of Dimebag's tragic demise rippled through the metal community, the news was met with shock and sadness.
"I'm speechless," former Rob Zombie/ Ozzy Osbourne bassist Rob Blasko Nicholson said. "This is totally unreal. Dimebag is a f---ing legend and this is total bullsh--." Damageplan also features Dimebag's brother, former Pantera drummer Vinnie Paul; singer Patrick Lachman and bassist Bob Zilla.
"This is insane and this is beyond travesty," Killswitch Engage frontman and former Damageplan tour partner Howard Jones said. "This is beyond anything I've ever heard. This shouldn't happen in or outside of the rock and metal community. He will be missed and mourned as a person, as a musician, and as a friend."
Oh dear, this is so sad. I really liked this guy. I thought he was an amazing guitarist. It's so sad how he died..I bet he didn't think about dying when he walked onto the stage that night. It's so very sudden and terrible....
-Gimpy
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[08 Dec 2004|12:42am] |
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The Butterfly Effect (movie) |
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| You scored as Chaotic Good. A Chaotic Good person is someone who has little intrinsic respect for laws or authority, seeing them as insufficient to sustain what's right. These people work according to their own moral compass which, while good, is not necessarily always aligned with that of society. Despite their chaotic tendancies, these people are good at heart.
Chaotic Good | | 85% | True Neutral | | 75% | Neutral Evil | | 60% | Neutral Good | | 55% | Lawful Good | | 50% | Lawful Evil | | 45% | Chaotic Evil | | 35% | Lawful Neutral | | 20% | Chaotic Neutral | | 10% | </td>
What is your Alignment?
created with QuizFarm.com |
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[30 Nov 2004|06:46pm] |
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Motivation - Dope |
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I have offically and totally lost all respect for Spyk...
It's quite sad.....
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[21 Nov 2004|11:50pm] |
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Accidently In Love - Counting Crows |
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Grr! Fucking Hell!! I give up man. There must be something wrong with me. I guess I seem to be picking fights with Tony. But I don't even realize that I'm doing it. WTF?!?!?!
Fuck! I had an awesome weekend, I was happy and in a great mood all weekend. Ironically enough, I didn't talk to Tony AT ALL this weekend, then I talk to him for about an hour and BOOM! We're fighting. And I'm no longer in a good mood.
GAHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! What the Hell?!?!?!?
Fuck it, I'm out of here...
-Gimpy
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| To No One It Concerns |
[13 Nov 2004|02:48am] |
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Falling Away From Me - KoRn |
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It has come to my attention that there are a few people reading my journal that I really don't feel comfortable with them reading, but whatever, I'm going to say what I want to say.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I feel lost, I feel hopeless. I don't know why. I can't for the life of me understand why. It doesn't make sense. But I do know that I can't take it, I can't stand these God-awful feelings that are going on inside of me. And I know that most of them are due to my parents(What other possible reason could any person have but to blame their parents? LOL). They keep me on such a tight "leash" that I can't stand it. I'm allowed to do NOTHING. Well, I can't say that, I am allowed to constantly clean, do laundry, dishes, things of that natural. Because my mother does nothing but sits in bed all day watching t.v. and complaining about how terrible she feels and how "if she could she would definitally help me cause it pains her so to watch me have to do everything". But yet she makes no attempt to even try and help me. Then she bitches and whines about how I do every little thing wrong and screw it up. Both my parents have told me on more then one occation that I'm a complete and total fuck up, then they will turn around and deny ever say such a thing. They critize, bitch, whine and yell at me ALL THE TIME. As they sit and their bed room and watch t.v. or are on the computer. And no, I'm not talking about just my mother now, I'm talking about my father as well. He does the same thing as her the minute he gets home from work.
I'm just so sick and tired of being treated like the slave of the family. I have no in put and no say as to what goes on in this place. Even though I'm the one doing EVERYTHING around here. They have flat out told me before that my input doesn't matter and I just need to shut up.
One thing that really pisses me off is the fact that they are easily the WORST parents in the world, and then they go and critize other people BEHIND THEIR BACKS abotu what an awful job at raising their kids they are doing, and how "people like them just shouldn't be allowed to have kids.". But they would never dare say something like that to the peoples face's, oh no. To their face they seem to be the nicest people in the world, and like they love the people they are around. Then the minute they leave, BOOM, complete 180* and they bitching about how annoying, or rude, or indecent, or unfit to be parents the people that no more then two seconds before hand they were acting all buddy-buddy with. AND THEY DON'T EVEN REALIZE THE HYPOCRISY IN ANYTHING THEY DO OR SAY!!!!!!!!
I've had enough of it! I seriously can not take it anymore. Plus, let me not forget to mention the fact that I've always got people on my back going "You shouldn't be so mean to your mother." or "How come your so mean to your parents?". I'm like that because I can't stand them!!!!!! If I'm talking to someone on the phone and talking in an aggitated to to my parents while I'm on the phone and the person thinks that I'm starting it with them. TRUST ME, I'M NOT! They just can't hear that well whats going on in the background. People don't understand why I'm so short with my parents. It's because I can't take it. I'm always treated like shit by them so I decided a while ago to just give it back to them. I don't care if they try and act nice to me cause I know that no less the a minute or so later, their gunna be hollering at me for something or another. So I've just given up. I've tried being nice and taking the shit, but I can't do that! I can only take so much from them.
The sad thing is that they don't even realize that they are doing this shit to me. And to be honest, despite what they say, I don't think that they really care. Wait, no I take that back. They do care, cause if something happened to me then they'd have no one to clean their house, do their laundry, cook their food, wash their dishes, and everything else.
I hear so many kids whinning about how terrible their lives are and how horrible their parents are. TRY FUCKING LIVING IN MY HOUSE FOR JUST A WEEK THEN COME TALK TO ME ABOUT SHITTY PARENTS!!
Yeah, I know that Im bitching now. But I seriously need to rant because I can't take it anymore. I've reached my limit. I'm not ok. I'm very far from ok.
I seem to have fallen into hold habits again. And I'm so very furious with them for pushing me to this point! When I've tried to talk to them, I've tried to express how I feel. And what does that get me? My mother telling me that I'm stupid, my father screaming at me, and my curled into a ball crying uncontrollably (No lie either, happens every time). And then the end result is just making things worse for me. No matter what I do, I can't win. I'm trying to fight a losing battle. No wait, I'm not even fighting. I'm trying to elimiate a losing battle. I just want out. I don't want any of their shit anymore. I can't handle any of it anymore. I've gone past my limit. I'm done.
No, this isn't final words of a suicide attempt. I'm not going to do that. I don't want to do that. But I'm afraid that if somethings not done, or something isn't changed. I might end up at that point. And thats not a point I want to be at. I don't want to do that. I don't want to take my life so to get away from my parents. I want to be able to just leave. Thats all I want is to leave.
And please don't sit there and go "Well if she really wanted help then she'd just ask her parents to get her some". Too late! I already have. I told my mother MONTHS ago that I wanted to see a therapist and she said "Alright, I'll make an appointment.". But she still hasn't gotten around to it because she never has the time. She tells me that she has more important things to do at the moment and just didn't remember to make it. But if it where for her or my dad she'd have already had it made and they would have already been. If it's anything for them it gets done right away. But for me, ha, yeah right. Like my knee being fucked up, I asked her to make an appointment...4 weeks later she did, then she cancelled it cause she didn't feel like going. And FINIALLY TWO MONTHS after it started bothing me, my dad took me to the hospital because I literally threw a fucking temper-tantrum and demanded that they take me. Hell, I even had Tony's MOTHER offer to take me and MY mother wouldn't let her. She made up a bunch of bullshit lies as to the reason why.
I can't take it anymore, bottom line. I NEED out. I don't know how much more of them I can take. I'm sick of being treated the way I do, then having them tell me "What the fuck are you talking about? Your a spoiled little brat that gets whatever she wants. I know several kids that have it worse then you. Hell when I was a kid I had it 50 times worse then you so stop bitching about it". And thats a direct quote people.
Ask anyone in my life that has known me for a good deal of time, like Paul or Mandie. And they'll tell you that I'm not lying on ANY of this shit. That I'm completly 100% dead serious.
I can't take it, and I don't know what to do to stop it...
-Gimpy
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| Doing This Yet Again This Year... |
[07 Nov 2004|02:01am] |
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Change Me - Twisted Method |
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THE STORY
Brian and his friends were the punks in town - and were part of an ongoing dispute with the jocks.
One evening in Amarillo, a fight started - provoked by the jocks - outnumbering the punks, at least
3 to 1. DUSTIN CAMP drove his Cadillac through the parking lot, hit one of the other punks, then
ran over Brian - crushing his body and killing him. CAMP never saw a jail cell. He has never paid a
dime. He was found guilty not of MURDER, but of manslaughter. His sentence? PROBATION, and a
fine of $10,000 that was WAIVED.
Let others know about this. Visit the website listed below for detailed information about this, and
to get the latest news about the senseless murder of a punk - and the prejudiced justice system
that turned their backs on the life of an outsider - because of the mere fact that he was a punk.
Let the global communitity know about this injustice.
Visit the website to find out how to contribute to a memorial fund, to remember Brian Deneke,
and to promote an annual festival that tries to make sure something like something like this NEVER occurs again.
http://www.briandeneke.org
R.I.P
1978-1997
If you guys want feel free to steal this and post it in your journals for all the people that have been victims of hate crimes.
"We're and war and you don't even know it!"
-Gimpy
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| Don't bother reading this. |
[17 Oct 2004|08:36pm] |
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extremely sad |
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Unholy Confessions -A7X |
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Yeah, if your reading this, don't bother. It's just me ranting and venting about some things that I need to get off my chest.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
God, I feel awful! This is such a terrible feeling I'm going through. I'm losing someone I deeply care about and I can't even do anything to stop it! There's nothing I can do or say to prevent it. I know that everyone has to deal with things on their own sometimes, but I always feel like I should be there for people, espically the one person that means more to me then anything else in this world. But I feel like I can't. Why? Because he won't let me in! He's constantly telling me that he wants to let me in and be open with me, but then he goes and lies to be about shit just so I'll shut up. I just want to be able to make everything better for him, and I can't! I try my best to make him happy, but it never works. Nothing can make him happy because he is who he is. Thats just how he is, I guess. Fuck! Why won't he let me in?!?!
Then he goes and says shit to me like "I don't know why your with me, I'm such a depressed Goth guy, why do you give a fuck about me?" or some shit similar to that. OMFG!! Why the fuck am I with you?!?! Because I love you so much and I care about you more then you could ever realize! THATS WHY!!!
FUCK! It tears me up inside and hurts me everytime he says something like that. Or when he says stuff like "I can't understand why you are with me, you shouldn't be, you can do much better". That's putting yourself down and you shouldn't do that because it's not true. I can't do better then you. I LOVE YOU! And everytime he says that it makes me thing 'Hmm..He says that shit so much, maybe he's trying to hint at something.'. I mean damn, if you want to break up with me, FUCKING DO IT! Don't lead me on, get it over with already.
He can't even understand how much he means to me!
He doesn't even realized that he's saved me.
And I don't think he'll ever realize it because he just won't open his eyes enough to see it. He refuses to believe that I really do love him and would do anything for him.
I can honestly say that I've never felt like this with any other guy. IT FEELS SO PERFECT AND RIGHT TO BE WITH HIM! Even when I'm feeling like this. I still know that he's perfect. That what we have feels perfect...
I dunno, maybe I feel all this shit just because I don't understand. I don't understand why he lies, and why he hides so much from me, I just don't understand how he can do the things he does to himself. I don't understand WHY it's such a tremedous struggle to get him to take care of himself. I mean, yeah, I know that sometimes he really doesn't want to because he's sick of it all. But he has to. If he really wants to die like he leads me to believe so very often, then just fucking tell me! God, just tell me something! Just as long as it's an honest answer!!!
I know that he does tell me the honest truth sometimes, but most of the time he just chooses to hide things from me. And I hate that! I want to know whats going on.
YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND HOW BAD YOUR KILLING ME!!!!!!
...You don't even understand how worried about you I am...
And not just me, people that are really close to them, he's killing them too! And he doesn't even know it!! He doesn't even see how bad he's hurting some. Even if I tried to tell him he wouldn't believe me. He doesn't see the shit that is going around him!
God, if you could only see what you were doing to the people that care about you...
-Gimpy
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| Hmm...Haven't updated in forever |
[09 Oct 2004|07:50pm] |
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Just Wanna Live - Good Charlotte |
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Yeah, It's been awhile since I've decided to update...
I haven't been up to much since last time I updated. Just hanging out with Tony.
Thats the same thing I did today. We hung out at my house and had an interesting day. I Gothed him out with complete makeup and he let me spike his hair up into a mohawk. OMG! He looked so hot! Heehee, wow. He looked so awesome. Anywho, He gave me my ring today. Even though I told him he didn't have to get me one. But it's so pretty. I really like it. Although he's going to have to get it re-sized cause it's too big for my ring finger so I'm wearing it on my middle finger for now. So umm, thats all I've got to write for now.
-Gimpy
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| Could America Just Be That Stupid? |
[02 Oct 2004|12:13am] |
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Vague - Orgy |
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Sometimes, when I’m tired, I step back and look at the raging battle between the underground music scene and the world of Commercial Music and I start asking myself: what are we fighting for? Day in and day out I hear kids bitching about why such and such band isn’t huge, why do video music channels suck so badly, how come Mastodon and Slayer aren’t really played on major radio stations? We like to chalk it up to some grand conspiracy within the walls of MTV and Clear Channel, but what if that’s not it. What if we’re fighting an opponent that’s just too stupid to understand what they’re doing? It might just be that 90% of America is too fucking stupid to appreciate or understand underground music and we’re all just screaming at a wall trying to get them to see it our way? What’s a huge seller in the music world right now? Usher, Britney Spears, Maroon 5? It seems to me-- and people like me-- that anybody with the propensity for rational thought could see that these “artists” are cardboard cutouts raised and groomed to sell a music product—not music. For awhile Limp Bizkit was huge, so was Disturbed and Saliva—I mean for fuck’s sake: SALIVA. These bands suck on so many levels it seems to us standing in the corner with the Obituary T-shirts on that they should be laughed at. Instead they’re trumpeted as metal, as something that’s part of the same scene as Slayer and Celtic Frost---BULLSHIT.
Most of the time large scale success is reserved for bands that are just awful. Success may happen on a small level for bands like Lamb Of God, Cradle Of Filth, Shadows Fall and Mastodon but after awhile the raw power and unforgiving music of those bands scare the audience and it’s back to Disturbed shouting “Oh waah ahh ahh” in front of sixty thousand screaming jocks. Do you really want to be part of what I call “Ignorant Metal”. Usually it’s surrounded by frat guys hiding in metal t-shirts and their idiot girlfriends who are dressed up in fifties gear and shaking the oh-so-irrelevant “metal horns”, and yes once Paris Hilton and the guy on The Amazing Race start using the metal horns, they are IRRELEVANT. I sure as hell don’t want that representing me. Some say that the video channels and radio stations have the power to persuade the American masses. If they’d play good music, everybody would be into good music. What if that’s not true, what if trying to get mass-mall-America to buy underground music is like feeding a Grizzly Bear a salad—they don’t know what it is, what to do with it and they sure as hell don’t want it.
I used to hate the bands for making the music but now it seems like they just don’t know any better. Maybe getting angry at Breaking Benjamin or Cold for not being good bands is like getting mad at kids in the Special Olympics for not being professional athletes—it’s just wrong. Some of you might think it’s just the metal scene but look around, this championing of mediocrity seeps into every music genre. Remember when hardcore and punk were scary, brutal and spit in the face of the status quo? Now look at it, it’s a homogenized fashion show with bands that really try to prove that they’re aggressive but it all ends up sounding like hardcore for girls. Why is that? Why didn’t Bad Brains, Minor Threat, Black Flag and so on become huge? Is it a conspiracy or is just that America is too stupid to understand those bands and needs something easily digested and pretty to look at. When Nirvana hit big everybody thought “Oh, ok, here’s the entrance of great music into the mainstream.” Well, no, that didn’t happen. The Melvins, Sonic Youth, The Pixies and such didn’t get huge—instead it was Bush, Stone Temple Pilots and Candlebox. The so called indie scene didn’t get huge with Guided By Voices, Superchunk or Husker Du. That scene didn’t get big until bands like The Strokes, White Stripes and Interpol came along with their re-hashed retro sound and polished good looks.
It seems like popular culture in America is just too shallow to appreciate the music that might actually make a difference so why try and force the issue? Look at Europe, Japan and South America. So many bands go there and play to huge crowds, with fans that go apeshit when they arrive. Bands can play two thousand seaters to stadiums in those places and then they come back here and play to 500 people —why is that? Don’t get me wrong, I love America, I just think we’re wasting a lot of energy trying break down walls that are better left up. Fuck ‘em, let them have the bad hardcore, nu-metal, shitty indie and the rest of the paper thin bands that try to front like they matter. Keep the underground music world within itself, let it grow naturally, don’t be cliquish—let anybody come in who wants to but if they want to leave, show ‘em the door. My whole point is that why fight to be part of an American landscape that doesn’t want us around and are too stupid to understand what we’re doing anyway. I don’t really want popular acceptance that much—do you?
By: Iann Robinson
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[29 Sep 2004|11:02pm] |
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Across The Nation - Union Underground |
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Yeah, Richard wanted me to give his number to people who wanted to get ahold of him. But since I don't know anyone that really wants to talk to him and due to the fact that I'm a lazy bitch and don't wanna ask people if they want his number/screen name I just decided to post this...
PsYcLoNeRaVeR: well anyone who wants to talk to me can reach me at 850-1951 or 693-1650
-Gimpy
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[23 Sep 2004|07:21pm] |
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very freakin' happy |
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Friday Night - The Darkness |
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Ha! Woohu, I got my cell phone fixed! Yey!! *does alittle happy dance*. Yeah, so ummm, the number is 239-560-2719 for those of you who have forgotten. Feel free to call me anytime day or night.
Anywaz, Yeah, just got back from Tony's a little bit ago, had alot of fun. It's awesome, I really love him.
-Gimpy
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| No words can express my shock |
[22 Sep 2004|01:13am] |
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Inside Out - Eve 6 |
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Oh my fucking God! Richard got married!!
Dude, I talked to him tonight and he told me that he got married and he and his WIFE are expecting their first child.
Yeah, he told me that he met her 3 weeks and 5 days ago and they got married and she is 3 weeks pregnant.
Now its totally kool for him to have gotten married that soon after meeting her, but to already be having a kid, thats just fucked up.
I told him that I figured he would have learned his lesson on UN-safe sex the first time and he said that he had but when he put a condom on his dick went soft and he couldn't get an erection back until he took it off..WTF?!?
So now he's married, living with his PARENTS, and he and his wife (Woah, sounds strange to say) are going to have a baby..Oh and did I mention that NEITHER OF THEM HAVE A JOB!!
Yeah, I see a bright and fruitful future for that child...
Plus I asked him what her name was and he said Brianna, then he said that he couldn't remember what her middle name was. Yeah, thats nice, he can't even remember his wife's middle name.
So yeah, anywhoooo, I told my parents all this cause I found it so funny. And they are pissed cause he was supposed to pay all my hospital bills cause of yeah, you know, but he never did. And now he went out and got married and got some chick pregnant and totally abandoned all agreements he made with my parents..So my mom is like planning on calling the cops cause some lawyer told her that that is the only way she can get the money for the hospitals cause it's not their responsiblity to pay, it's his...
Oh, and did I mention that she's a REDNECK...??
-Gimpy
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| Damnit... |
[18 Sep 2004|08:05pm] |
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In The End - Linkin Park |
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Damnit, this sucks. I tried to get tickets to Larry the Cable Guy and they were sold out. So I asked my mom if I could get tickets to go and see X-Fest and she said "Well, I'm done with spending money of tickets for concerts this year". So I guess that I don't get to go...*cries* Fuck! I wanted to go see Saliva and Papa Roach, but I guess that I don't get to cause my mom doesn't want to spend anymore money on tickets...BITCH!
-Gimpy
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| Yeah, about time I updated... |
[17 Sep 2004|01:04am] |
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Ribbons and Bows - Trisha Yearwood |
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Hmm, haven't updated lately so I think that I shall...
I don't really remember all thats went on since I last updated, so I'll just tell you what I remember.
Um, was over at Satan's cause my parents thought the hurricane was going to hit, and it didn't so we came back home.
Argued with my parents for like 3 striaght days
Tony purposed. (I said yes. :-D)
Went over and saw Tony Tuesday.
Then again Wednesday.
Then again Today..LOL..
Yeah, that's the basics of what I've been up to lately...
-Gimpy
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[08 Sep 2004|07:43pm] |
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Going Under - Evanesence |
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...I DON'T WANT TO MOVE TO OHIO!...
Why is it that everytime something good happens to me something even more fucked up happens and I end up getting screwed over?
I think my parents get joy out of watching me crubble and break. I think they get some sort of sick pleasure out of it...
-Gimpy
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| (no subject) |
[07 Sep 2004|06:59pm] |
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Solitary Man - H.I.M |
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Ok, I'm sick and tired of hurricanes..They can feel free to go away now...
Was at Satan's for the weekend
Got incredibly aggrivated with all the rain
Talked to Tony
Talked to Richard
Talked to Ruben
Had dinner with my mom mom, dad, and Priscilla for her b-day
Bought some new clothes
Figured out what I'm going to be for Halloween.
Yeah, thats about all I've done..Sounds exciting, huh?
So umm yeah, talked to Richard. My God, he's become the worlds most depressed person on the planet..It's really annoying that he doens't even laugh or anything like that anymore. And he's become rather rude. He acutally YELLED at me the other night! I was so fucking shocked that I was left speachless..LOL
And ha, I think that I might have worked things out with Ruben. Or atleast put him in his place, cause he's being really nice to me now and not acting like a complete dick.
And I think that that would be a first for him...
So for Halloween I'm going to be a Dominatrix and I'm looking for a bunch of dudes that want to be my "sex slaves". So if you want me be a sex slave for Halloween let me know..LOL..
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| ...Frances has always been a bitch... |
[31 Aug 2004|01:27am] |
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Life After Lisa - Bowling For Soup |
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Dude, WTF!? There's another hurricane coming towards Florida. Seriously man, thats not kool. Those people that lost everything DO NOT need that shit.
The hurricane's name is Frances. Heh, Mandie doesn't that so sound like something that Frances (Think about WHO I'm talking about for a minute..LOL) would do. Geesh, I said "Watch Frances is gunna come right over Florida just to fuck everything up, just to be a bitch"...Kinda sound familiar to me you?? LOL
Hopefully I get to go to Sarasota Saturday still. That should be interesting cause I think that Tony is coming with us..LMAO..Me, him, my mom, and my dad all stuck in one car together for two hours. Just imagine what could happen...*gets scared*
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[29 Aug 2004|01:55am] |
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We Are The Normal - Goo Goo Dolls |
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Ha, it's offical, I'm a dumbass...
My cellphone quit working today..Stupid P.O.S...And as I was looking at it trying to see if I could find out what the problem was, I just got so frustrated with it that I just broke the damned thing..LOL..I broke the screen on it. So eve if it did randomly decide to work again it wouldn't work very well cause of the screen.
So yeah monday my mom's got to call and see about Verizon giving me another phone...
To be honest I'm surpried that phone lasted me as long as it did without be smashing it to peices.
Anywho,
Today was a good day. I highly enjoyed it. It was much fun. And ha, Tony survived dinner with my parents. Heh, go figure. Who would have thought that one would have happened?
Well I'm tired, so it's off to bed for me..Goodnight and Pleasent Nightmares to all!
-Gimpy
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| Hells Bells |
[27 Aug 2004|12:20am] |
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Castles In The Sky - Amber |
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Me and my dad have been at eachother's throats the past couple of weeks. We're really pissing eachother off and agruing alot...So you know what that means...
Time for mom to send us both to another therapy section!
AC/DC HERE WE COME!!!!
-Gimpy
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| Don't Mind Me. Just Needed To Get Some Things Out |
[26 Aug 2004|01:38am] |
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So Cold - Breaking Benjamins |
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I really hate it when people hold grudges, life is too short for that.
I IMed Sean tonight and tried to talk to him and apoligize for blowing up at him when he was being a childish little bastard about a month ago. I wanted to tell him that I was sorry and try and move past it. But he's such a fucking asshole that he says he excepts my apoligy and then acts like a total dick towards me and barely talks to me. GAH!! Seriously ok, I apoligized, time to move on and get over it. But will he, nooooo. Cause I hurt his feelings and offended him. But come on. He's 20 years old and throws a fucking temper tantrum when he doesn't get his way exactly. And he'll bitch about everything and then do nothing to try and change what he's bitching about..
OK, moving along from one asshole to another...
I talked to Richard for a few minutes tonight...
That was quite interesting. He apparently broke up with Robin right after he and I talked on the phone the last time..Which was about a month and a half ago, if not alittle longer. And when I asked him what he was up to he just said that he's been thinking alot for the past couple of weeks. And me being the dumbass that I am made the mistake of inquiring as to what he was thinking about. So he told me that he's been thinking about me and him and everything that happened, also he said he was thinking about how much he misses me and how he still doesn't want anymore else but me.
*starts screaming*. I DO NOT WANT HIM SAYING ANY OF THAT SHIT!!!!. It makes me feel slightly guilty. AND I DO NOT WANT TO FEEL GUILTY OVER THAT MOTHERFUCKER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*bangs head on table* Why didn't I listen to Spyk?!?!?!??!?! Damnit! I ALWAYS listen to him cause I know that he's always right when I ask for his opinion on something. But the one time that I DON'T listen to him, LOOK WHAT FUCKING HAPPENS!!
GRR! I wish I would have listened to him...Why didn't I??
That's one question that is always going to bug me...I always listen to him on EVERYTHING, so why didn't I listen to him this time...??
...I really wished I would have. I didn't need anymore of the shit Richard caused me...
And I know that if it hadn't had been for a few of my close friends I would have never made it through all that shit. You guys helped me out more then any of you could have possibly imgained...Espically you Cameron. You were the one that was always on the phone talking to me about what was going on and helping me out.
...Before I met Richard I always lived my life with completely no regrets. But now I regret ever meeting him and going against some advice that I now know was some of the best adivce I should have taken...
Although I still stand by the fact that everything happens for a reason.
I guess I chose to be stubborn and be with Richard for a reason. I'm not entirely sure what that reason is. My only guess is so that it could force me to grow up and realize that I shouldn't be so naive about things and that I shouldn't trust people as easily as I did before.
My adivce to any chick reading this...Never ever EVER date someone like Richard. Guys like him deserve to have their dicks cut off and shoved down their throats.
Damnit, I fucking hate him so much!
Yeah, I know your all thinking that I said I'd never hate him and shit like that. But I'm tired of puting on an act just so I'll seem like a nice person and that everything with us was peachy-keen. Thats fucking bullshit...
I just really needed to vent and let some things out.
Damnit, I feel like shit now. Stupid human emotions...
Although there is one thing I can be happy about. He's no longer in my life and I don't have to deal with him. And now I have a wonderful guy in my life who I know will never in a million year do to me the things that Richard did...
-Gimpy
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| ...Lazy Bitch... |
[25 Aug 2004|05:30pm] |
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I Am - Dope |
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GAH!! I swear, my mother is such a fucking lazy bitch. I ask her to do one thing that isn't even an inconveniance to what she was already planning on doing. And she won't even do it. I ask her to stop by North to pick up some of my records from there because I need them to be able to enroll in to my classes at High Tech North. But nooooo, she won't fucking go and get them. I told her that I'd get them, but she won't even let me do that. She's just too lazy to stop by the school and walk in and ask for Danielle Ellyson's records. Which by the way, are already sitting on Mrs. Weatherwax's desk in the front office. I asked her why she wouldn't get them and her exact words were "Cause it's too much trouble". Now seriously please someone enlighten me as to how it's too much trouble when she's going to my uncle's house ACROSS THE STREET FROM THE SCHOOL.
Then since I was pissed and arguing with her about it, my dad just had to get involved and he started screaming at me. So I just walked away and punched the door of the entertainment center in my living room..Now all of my knuckles are all nice and red. AND I'M STILL PISSED.
Fuck! I can not wait until they move next year, I will be so happy. They will be in OHIO and I will be here in FLORIDA..Ha, thats thousands of miles away. *gets a dreamy look on her face* Ah, what a wonderful thoght...
Dude, I swear I wish my mom would pull her head out of her ass. Seriously she needs to either realize that it's all in her head or fucking show me some actual medical proof that there really is something wrong with her besides being a hypocondriac. And when she shows me that there is really something wrong with her, then thats when I'll start being nice to her and acutally start giving a shit. But right now, I don't really care at all about it. I hate fucking drug-addicated(Oxycontin, Prozac, Zanex and some othe stuff), whiney ass, hypocontriacs that are faking shit jus to get attention.
-Gimpy
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[23 Aug 2004|05:54pm] |
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Sugar Kane - Sonic Youth |
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Well I just got done packing up ALL the food in my food cabinet (And for those of you who have seen it, know that thats ALOT of food) and now we're going to take it down to the Fire Department in Port Charlotte for the people out there. And my mom and I just got back from the store where we bought about $50 worth of baby food and shit like that. Plus we bought some more regular food and water to add to the boxes (and boxes..LOL) of stuff we already have. So yeah hopefully that will help all the people that lost everything they had.
Not only that but they are asking for money donations too so my mom is gunna donate like $200 she said.
So yeah, you know the saying "Every little bit helps".
Anywho, other then that not much else is going on.
-Gimpy
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